MMB's March Giveaway!

I can resist doubling my chances for winning something fun at Mormon Mommy Blogs this month. You can enter too. I guess telling you that decreases my chances. Hm. Somebody want to run the numbers on that one for me?

Post or Perish?

Ever have one of those time periods when you have nothing useful to add to the human conversation and you're out of cute stories and pictures and the stuff you want to write about you want to keep to yourself? No? Oh good. That means there will be something cool to read when I come moseying by your blogs.

I promise to post again soon. Probably three or four posts all at once because when the old grey matter decides to purge, my creations will likely be deep and often poignant. Probably wordy. Possibly amusing. Come back then, my friends.

In the meantime, seventy people a day shall come and look at the pictures of nits and lice, of President Lincoln and family, and for some odd reason the picture of Heidi and me arm wrestling. Thank you, Google images.

O Farewell My Pride, I Shall Miss Thee

[Alternate title: If the shoe fits wear it, if you can find it, because the mighty uncomfortable road to hell is paved with good intentions.}

As you might imagine, getting six kids ready for church every week is a stressful event under the best of circumstances. During our weekly public presentation of the La Family, it's nice if everyone is wearing underwear and has been bathed in the last month. People are looking. Really they are. Every time I convince myself that no one cares what we look like, someone blows a hole in my delusion with a well placed comment. Or by an entire ad lib addition to a talk.

This week we had underwear, everyone was freshly bathed, and we even had clean church attire. And we were on track for a timely arrival. I was feeling good. Right up until shoe-time. Those shoes—those blasted, infuriating shoes—were our dilemma this week.

We do have a central location where the shoes belong. It is just not working out as well as I had hoped it would, not normally a big deal. I hardly ever wear shoes. I live in California. It's comfy to go shoeless.

Anyhow four of us had shoe crisises yesterday. Three of us experienced a happy ending to our crisis. Alas not I: I went to church barefoot this week. After thirty minutes looking for a pair of my own shoes that matched, I gave up. I found a dozen single shoes, and not a pair among them. What are the chances? Pretty high around here actually.

My teen and I wear the same size shoes so there are our two black holes bedrooms that swallow unwary soles. The baby loves shoes too. She carries them hither and yon, dropping one yon, the other hither. Sometimes I find my shoes in the toy sty box, sometimes outside, sometimes in the towel cabinet. Not this time.

This time I gave up looking for the shoes, bit the bullet and went to church shoeless. Attending church is more important than my pride. Right? Jesus would rather have me at church barefoot than blogging at home barefoot. Right? I need to go to church. Right? I can be reverent and barefoot. I can sit with my feet under my chair and no one will notice. Right? Right?

We came in twenty-five minutes late and sat in the very last row. The children immediately scattered to the far winds. Tithing slips. Bathroom. Drinks. In vain did I motion for them to return. So I took a couple deep cleansing breaths and settled down to hear the pleasing word of God, tucking my feet discretely beneath my chair.

The Stake President arose, began to praise punctuality for and reverence during Sacrament Meeting, wearing one's best in church, polishing one's shoes, etcetera. Um, I polished my feet with one of those little pedi-egg things on Saturday. I was wearing the best clean dress I owned. I intended to be on time. Surely, surely that counts.

I was squirming and thinking of the bad luck of my shoes going AWOL on our annual reverence Sunday. And then...and then...he said that he had gone on long enough and that he needed to move on to the talk he had written. ARG! This wasn't a planned talk. It was ad lib, ad hoc, directed right ad me.

I fought the urge to run home. I bit the bullet harder, held my head up high, and walked carefully through the crowded halls to Sunday School. The closest available seat was a couple of feet away from the Stake President. I sat.

Oh well. It really is more important to be at church than to have shoes on. Still, I think I'll find my shoes on Saturday next week.

Praise and thanks be to the Yvil Sister

Mission San Francisco de Solano, front

Mission San Francisco de Solano, back

L-Boy is in fourth grade, which in California means a California Mission Project (CMP). The Y-vil sister went to the craft store and bought stuff—a styrofoam do-it-yourself model, a bunch of cute plastic thingies, some peat moss and a bag of sand. Then she had three making the CMP dates with L. I don't know who had the better time. Yvil was like a little kid in an art class, L was serious, yet happy, and I was out of a dreaded task.

Yvil delegated the procurement of the cross and the CMP fact card to me. Two things. You think I could have excelled. But as we all know in addition to being more fun than mom, aunties are also more efficient.

Although I looked very thoroughly in all of my normal [cheap] stores, the only cross I found that was the right size and not firmly attached to an angel was a chocolate one. I got it, but Yvil had already given up on me and had carved one out of leftover styrofoam. Thus did L gain a snack.

Then Mr. L and I nearly came to blows over the CMP facts card last night. In the end, the card came out looking great. L and I had a big long snuggle to make up for the grumping. Still I was emotionally spent; just imagine if Yvil hadn't taken care of the hard part. I owe her. Big time.

Great job, L.  I love you. 

I Love Goodwill!

I have been wanting this for about five years. It costs $89 plus shipping from Magic Cabin. I found it in perfect condition for $4.99 at Goodwill tonight. Rejoice with me, my friends! 

I Covet the Kindle 2

Ooooo-ahhhh!

Ain't she a beaut!

Quick Announcement

Love you all. I'm going to make my following status private. Don't take it personally. I still love you. I'll still read you. But the clique issues that have been raised in some circles have caused me concern that I might inadvertently be slighting someone. Don't want to do that. Not following publicly is my best shot at being clique neutral. 

Smiles everyone, smiles!

Square Root Day?

3/3/9 

Hm. Well 3 x 3 = 9.  So the square root of nine would be three. But it's a bit of a stretch to call it Square Root Day. After all, the year is two thousand and nine A.D. 

If Hallmark comes out with a card, I'm going to begin an international protest. But as long as Hallmark stays out of it, I'm as willing to celebrate a fake holiday as the next person. Behold "my" creation!

And in the spirit of the day I'll even do a little advance planning for a year that is actually a square number: 2025 (square root = 45). Let's all get excited on the 45th day of 2025. OK, friends, pencil it in. February 14, 2025. And I've found the perfect location for our celebration. Bring your sweetheart! Who's in?

Another One

I know I'm killing my stats by posting odd videos from my son, but I can't help it. He's so crazy pleased with himself and I'm crazy in love with the kid, so here you go--another one.

Apparently the last video was posted with an inadequate amount of background, so allow me to explain. Mr. J, my beloved 14 year old, is obsessed with puzzles. He loves trying to solve them in record time. (I think he's down to 38 seconds on the flat Rubik's Magic puzzle featured in the previous video.) His newest use of his camera and his time has been this stop-motion animated self-solving Rubik's Cube. His cube is painted because he wore all the stickers off. Wore. The. Stickers. Off. Anyhow, enjoy my baby boy's little game. It's only a minute and five seconds.